A Tribute to My Good Ole Dad

Living in a fatherless home is a crisis too many are personally acquainted with.   Google ‘father statistics in America’ and you will see shocking statistics baring the importance of a loving father being in the home. 

I grew up fortunate.  I never worried if my dad would leave the home or my mom.  I never worried if he would choose work over family.  I never worried about what he thought about me- I knew he thought I hung the moon.  I saw it in his eyes.  In fact, he thought each of his children hung the moon. 

My dad taught me many things. 

He did not simply tell me to work hard; he showed me how.   He modeled a strong work ethic in his job and the things he was placed in charge of.    

He did not simply tell me to love sports, he showed me how.   He played with me.  He came to all my games.  He believed in me. 

He did not simply tell me to take the long view, he showed me how.  He lived below his means.  He gave unselfishly.   He lived each moment anticipating the future. 

He did not simply tell me to love the church, he showed me how.   Weekly we went to church as a family. 

He did not simply tell me to pursue my giftings, he modeled it.   He read, wrote, researched, and read more.  My father truly is a walking encyclopedia and a very gifted writer. 

He did not simply tell me to love nature and the outdoors, he modeled it.  We hiked.  We played outside.  We made forts.  We gardened. 

He did not simply tell me he loved me, he showed me.  He loved my mama.  He read stories to me.  He wrote personal letters to me- something I still request to this day over a hallmark card with someone else’s words on it.  He took me on long walks.  He played tennis with me.   He drove me around looking at my fetish of abandoned houses.  He ‘dated’ me and was the first to show me chivalry. 

With Father’s day coming up, I truly am thankful for my good ole Dad!

I Am Not The Girl You Married

I am not the girl you married.

From that first date- you were different than all others I had dated or even known. In fact, you far surpassed them. You see, you treated me with utmost respect from the get go. You gave chivalry a new name. You did far more than open my doors, pay for my meals, etc. You affirmed my personhood and always had a vision for me far beyond where I actually was. You saw my unique makeup that was only a seed and envisioned a beautiful tree. You had this uncanny way of seeing me restored in areas that were broken. You saw who God was making me yet accepted me right where I was.

You spoke to me on one of those first dates about true beauty. You told me that many women are pretty and only few are beautiful as beauty comes from the inside and radiates out. You challenged me to always seek and spend my time first on inward beauty. You are a rare gem, babe, who gets beauty in this upside down world.

From that first date, I always knew it would be you and you alone. God had placed a man in my path who I wanted to do life with forever. You were not only incredibly handsome and funny, you made me want to know my Savior more. I was better when I was with you.

On that special day, 10 years ago, I said yes to you and no to all others. You see, my parents taught me loyalty well. I knew that day that I was with the man I had prayed for and God had given. However, I had no idea how hard marriage could be, the trials we would suffer through, or the beauty that would come through brokenness.

We have struggled. We have said too many words in anger. Yet, because of your leadership, we move past those ugly fights because you model repentance. Now, I too repent instead of acting as if I can do no wrong.

You have made me rich. I am so rich in friendship, so rich in family, so rich in memories, and so rich in love.

You are the chief repenter in our family and the modeler of grace. Because of you, I know Jesus more.

I found your prayer cards...prayers you have prayed for me for years. I wept because God has answered many. So many times you must have held your tongue- an act that seems impossible to do at times. What discipline you possess to shut your mouth and simply pray for me.

You play a daily role in redeeming me from my besetting sins of shyness, hardheartedness, greed, anger, and materialism just to name a few....and beauty is forthcoming. As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.

I am not the girl you married, I am better because of you!

You Thought I Was Not Watching....

You thought I was not watching….

 

You are smart.  You love numbers.  The world was a calling you to make a name for yourself in your prime.  The potential you had was limitless.  You possess drive, discipline, compassion, accurateness, and tactfulness just to name a few.  Yet, your answer was no, and in the process, you accrued treasures that are eternal and stored up for you in heaven.  You said no to frivolous things.  You did not need the newest car or the nicest clothes or the newest things- all things that would require more and more money.  Specifically, you said, “I would rather live in a tent than miss out on raising my babes.”  By saying no to excess, you said yes to your children and in return your grandchildren.  

 

You thought I was not watching you fold endless loads of laundry or make meal after meal, but I was.  It modeled the provision of the father. 

 

You thought I was not watching you pull out your devotion to spend time with the one who made you and me, but I was.  It modeled devotion and dependence- both beautiful and essential for life with God. 

 

You thought I was not watching you stay faithfully married with your husband and my Dad and not run to another or throw in the towel when life gets hard as it does for us all, but I was.  It modeled staying power. 

 

You thought I was not watching you ache over my poor choices, but I was.  It modeled pursuit, love, and grace ultimately playing a part in me believing God is not mad at me and succumbing to grace. 

 

You thought I was not watching you give your time to others through volunteering, but I was.  It modeled service and sacrifice.

 

You thought I was not watching you use your money wisely acting as a good steward of all God entrusted to you by living below your means, saving wisely, &  lavishly giving, but I was.  It changed the trajectory of the family for generations to come. 

 

You thought I was not watching you sacrifice your sleep to pray or listen to a child that needed to talk, but I was. 

 

You thought I was not watching you in all those monotonous tasks for all those many years, but I was.  Thank you for each little chore, each little meal, each tear you every cried, each prayer you prayed….for they were not in vain.  I love watching God shape you and grow you.  It is beautiful.  

 

I too love Jesus and pray that in my brokenness my children will somehow see Jesus and succumb as I did to his wonderful grace.